White House in Crisis as Biden’s Son’s Crack Habit Threatens USDC Funds and Environment

The White House was left reeling this week after news broke that President Biden’s son Hunter’s crack habit had triggered a financial crisis of epic proportions. It appears that Hunter, who had been living in a luxury apartment in San Francisco, had been using a significant portion of his sizable income to fund his crack addiction.

In an effort to hide his activities, Hunter had been funneling the funds through a now-defunct Silicon Valley Bank (NASDAQ: SIVB). Unfortunately, the bank’s closure has left the future of Circle (CRYPTO: USDC) in jeopardy, as the company had been storing a large sum of cash there.

To make matters worse, it appears that the USDC is directly linked to global warming. That’s because the currency is backed by carbon credits, which are used to offset emissions from burning fossil fuels. As the funds from the USDC are now in jeopardy, it could lead to an increase in emissions and further strain the environment.

The White House has yet to comment on the matter, but many are hoping that the President’s son will soon receive the help he needs to overcome his addiction. In the meantime, the USDC funds and the environment may be in jeopardy if the situation is not resolved soon.

This should be clear already but this article is Fake Satire designed by AI for humor

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