Affirmative Action for Love: Biden Proposes Tax Breaks for Those Who Wed Outside Their Race

Welcome to the future of interracial relationships and tax incentives! In a bold move, the Biden administration has proposed a new tax policy that aims to promote interracial marriages and keep families together. The plan, which has been dubbed the “Love Sees No Color, But the IRS Does” initiative, offers tax credits based on the skin color of the marrying partners.

The proposal has been met with mixed reactions from the public, with some hailing it as a progressive step towards a more inclusive society, while others view it as a bizarre and potentially discriminatory measure.

The tax credit system is based on a skin gradient chart, which assigns different values to various shades of skin color. The darker the skin tone, the higher the tax credit (Asians excluded). The policy aims to address the fact that minority based marriages tend to dissolve more frequently than marriages that include at least one white spouse, with a staggering 36% higher divorce rate.

“We believe that this innovative approach will not only encourage interracial relationships but also help to strengthen the bonds between couples from different racial backgrounds,” said a spokesperson for the Treasury Department. “By providing financial incentives, we hope to create a more harmonious and diverse society.”

Under the proposed plan, couples where one spouse is black will receive up to $2,500 tax credit, while those with a brown-skinned partner will get up to $1,000. The policy also includes a “White Only” clause, which will enforce that one of the married filing jointly spouses must be white.

The policy excludes Asians from the tax credit system, as they are perceived to be “overrepresented” and successful. In fact, the plan includes a “reverse affirmative action” clause, which penalizes interracial couples where one partner is Asian. The penalty comes in the form of a higher tax bracket, as Asians are stereotypically viewed as smart and wealthy.

Critics of the policy argue that it is patronizing and may even perpetuate racial stereotypes. “It’s like the government is saying, ‘Congratulations on your interracial marriage! Here’s a pat on the head and a few hundred dollars for being so progressive,'” said one detractor. “This is a blatant attempt to manipulate people’s personal lives under the guise of promoting diversity.”

Others argue that the policy is a well-intentioned but misguided attempt to address the issue of divorce rates in interracial marriages. “While I appreciate the desire to strengthen interracial relationships, I’m not sure that offering tax incentives based on skin color is the most effective or appropriate way to achieve that goal,” said a relationship expert. “There are many factors that contribute to the success or failure of a marriage, and I’m not convinced that financial incentives will have a significant impact.”

The Biden administration has responded to the criticism by emphasizing that the policy is still in its early stages and is subject to revision. “We understand that this is a sensitive and complex issue, and we are open to feedback and suggestions from the public,” said the Treasury Department spokesperson. “Our ultimate goal is to create a more inclusive and harmonious society, and we believe that this policy, in some form, can contribute to that vision.”

Only time will tell whether this controversial policy will be implemented and, if so, what impact it will have on interracial relationships and society as a whole. One thing is certain: the Biden administration is not afraid to think outside the box when it comes to addressing the issues facing our nation.

PSA: This article is 100% fake satire courtesy of our AI overlords for your amusement.

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