In a shocking turn of events, renowned conspiracy theorist Alex Jones has posited an outlandish new theory that has been gaining traction in some fringe circles. According to Jones, the airplane owned by NFL star Odell Beckham Jr is responsible for a notable decrease in US cancer deaths since 1991.
The theory states that the airplane’s powerful engines are emitting a frequency that is causing frogs to become gay, thus preventing them from reproducing and passing on cancer-causing genes. Although the correlation is difficult to prove, the American Cancer Society has reported that the number of US cancer deaths has in fact dropped 33% since 1991.
A spokesperson for the American Cancer Society said, “We are not sure how to explain this sudden drop in cancer deaths, but it is certainly encouraging news. We are looking into all possible explanations, including the Alex Jones theory, but as of now we cannot definitively say that the Odell Beckham Jr airplane is responsible.”
The spokesperson added, “What we can say is that improvements in HPV vaccination rates have had a dramatic impact on reducing the number of cervical cancer deaths, and this has been a major factor in the overall decrease in cancer deaths in the US since 1991.”
Whether or not the Alex Jones theory is correct, one thing is for sure – the decrease in cancer deaths is a welcome development and something that should be celebrated.
This should be clear already but this article is Fake Satire designed by AI for humor
