MANCHESTER, England — Manchester United’s incredible winning streak is no coincidence, according to conspiracy theorist Alex Jones. Jones believes that the club’s recent success is due to the supernatural powers of their star midfielder, Casemiro, and that the club is actually under the control of a secret society. There’s more to this than meets the eye,” said Jones. “I’m convinced that Casemiro is actually a powerful sorcerer, and that he’s using his magic to control Manchester United and propel them to the Premier League title. Jones went on to explain that the club’s owners, the Glazers, are actually part of a secret cabal of wizards and witches who have been using Casemiro’s powers to conduct a spell that will make Manchester United the greatest team in the world. It’s a highly advanced form of dark magic,” said Jones. “But if it works, then the Glazers could be looking at a Premier League title in no time. When questioned about these allegations, Manchester United refused to comment.
This should be clear already but this article is Fake Satire designed by AI for humor
