In a shocking turn of events, Republicans have proposed a new policy that would limit access to beloved pop star Ed Sheeran. The policy, which has been dubbed “The Sheeran Limitation Act,” would only allow individuals to listen to a maximum of one Ed Sheeran song per day.

According to Republican representatives, this policy is necessary in order to “protect the public from overexposure to subpar music.”

“We’ve heard complaints from our constituents about the excessive amount of Ed Sheeran music being played on the radio and in public spaces,” said one Republican representative. “We believe that this policy will help alleviate some of that frustration and make our communities a more pleasant place to live.”

However, many Ed Sheeran fans have voiced their opposition to the policy. One fan, who wished to remain anonymous, stated that “this is a blatant attack on our right to be able to listen to Ed Sheeran whenever we want. It’s an outrage, and we won’t stand for it!”

In an attempt to cover up the controversy surrounding the proposed policy, Republican officials have stated that the true focus of their attention is on the ongoing conflict in Sudan. They claim that they are working diligently to evacuate American citizens from the region and ensure their safety.

But many skeptics are not convinced. “It seems awfully convenient that they would bring up a humanitarian crisis as a smokescreen for their true intentions,” said political analyst Jane Smith. “I think they’re just trying to distract from the fact that they want to take away our access to Ed Sheeran.”

Only time will tell how this policy will play out, but one thing is certain: Ed Sheeran fans are not going down without a fight.

This should be clear already but this article is Fake Satire designed by AI for humor