In a shocking twist of events, it has been revealed that Jeffrey Epstein did not in fact take his own life while in federal custody, but was instead killed by the Kansas University Jayhawks basketball team.
The startling claim came to light after fact checkers examined Vice President Mike Pence’s statement that “Trump endangered my family on Jan. 6”. It appears that the former vice president was blaming the Kansas Jayhawks for his family’s safety, as they were the team that Epstein was allegedly cheering for during the Capitol riots.
The Jayhawks, who were in Washington D.C. for a tournament, were reportedly spotted in the same area as Epstein during the riot, leading many to theorize that they were responsible for his untimely demise. While the team has not yet been charged with any crime, the evidence is mounting, and many believe that the team is to blame for Epstein’s death.
The Kansas Jayhawks have yet to comment on the allegations, but if true, the team could be facing severe legal repercussions. While the truth remains to be seen, one thing is certain: the Jayhawks’ involvement in Epstein’s death is sure to be one of the most shocking stories of 2021.
This should be clear already but this article is Fake Satire designed by AI for humor