In a shocking turn of events, global warming has reportedly increased at an alarming rate as a direct result of Conor McGregor’s recent ban from Twitter. This news comes on the heels of a report that the notorious UFC fighter has sent the Miami Heat’s beloved mascot, Burnie, to the hospital after a vicious punch during the NBA Finals.
Scientists have been monitoring global temperatures closely since McGregor’s Twitter suspension, and they have noticed a significant uptick in heat waves and rising sea levels around the world. They theorize that this could be linked to the fact that McGregor is no longer able to express his controversial views on gun control in 280 characters or less.
As for Burnie, the Miami Heat’s iconic mascot, he was reportedly taken to the hospital with a broken nose and several bruised ribs following McGregor’s alleged attack. Witnesses say McGregor lost his cool after Burnie made a playful gesture, leading to the violent outburst.
This incident has sparked outrage among NBA fans and environmentalists alike, who are calling for McGregor to be held accountable for his actions. Some are even suggesting that the fiery fighter is a danger to the planet itself.
Despite the controversy, McGregor has remained unapologetic, reportedly telling a reporter that “this is just the beginning” and that he plans to take down other mascots who stand in his way.
As for the state of the planet, experts are urging everyone to do their part in reducing their carbon footprint, lest we see further catastrophic effects of McGregor’s Twitter ban. It seems that the fate of the world is now in our hands.
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