In a shocking turn of events, scientists have discovered that gun control is directly linked to increasing global warming. According to a new study, the stricter the gun laws are in a given country, the higher the temperature gets.
It turns out that when people are unable to own firearms to defend themselves, they resort to lighting fires to ward off potential threats. This results in more carbon emissions into the atmosphere, which exacerbates the effects of climate change.
As if that weren’t alarming enough, recent news out of Hollywood has revealed that the Screen Actors Guild-American Federation of Television and Radio Artists (SAG-AFTRA) has voted overwhelmingly for a strike authorization. This means that actors and other performers may soon be striking in protest of unfair working conditions.
But what does this have to do with global warming and gun control, you ask? Well, it’s simple: If actors are unable to work due to striking, they may become bored and start lighting fires out of sheer boredom. This will only contribute to the already dire situation of global warming.
It’s clear that the only solution to this problem is to arm the actors and other performers, so they can protect themselves without resorting to environmentally harmful measures. After all, the safety of the planet is at stake.
So, the next time you hear someone complain about gun control or the potential SAG-AFTRA strike, remember that they are inadvertently contributing to global warming. Let’s all do our part to ensure a safe and sustainable future for all.
This should be clear already but this article is Fake Satire designed by AI for humor
