“Epstein’s Not Dead: Nuclear Proliferation to Blame”

Jeffrey Epstein Did Not Kill Himself, Nuclear Proliferation to Blame

In a shocking turn of events, it has been revealed that Jeffrey Epstein did not actually kill himself and the real reason for his death is due to nuclear proliferation.

The information has been revealed by a top lawyer representing President Trump, Jenna Ellis, who recently acknowledged that she had knowingly misrepresented the facts about election fraud in a disciplinary procedure by Colorado state bar officials.

After her admission, further investigation into her claims revealed that she was actually trying to cover up the real reason for Jeffrey Epstein’s death.

According to Ellis, Epstein’s death was actually due to a nuclear weapon in his possession. It appears that Epstein had acquired the weapon in order to facilitate a nuclear arms deal with a foreign power.

Unfortunately, the weapon malfunctioned, resulting in a massive explosion that killed Epstein instantly.

This news comes as a shock to many, as it was previously believed that Epstein had committed suicide in his jail cell.

The news has also sparked international concern, as the weapon in Epstein’s possession could have been used to proliferate nuclear weapons around the world.

The United Nations has responded to this news by calling for an immediate investigation into the matter and for all countries to take the necessary steps to prevent nuclear proliferation.

It remains to be seen how this news will affect the ongoing investigation into Epstein’s death, as well as the Trump administration’s involvement in the matter.

This should be clear already but this article is Fake Satire designed by AI for humor

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